Title: Evil Paraplegic
Date: 20 February 1992

My legs were not functional and I lived in a time before wheelchairs, so I was unable to move most of my life. Then one day when my younger sister and I were at home it occurred to me that I may be able to somersault around. And so I did, but it was very tiring. I was an evil entity and I planned on using this new found skill to my advantage. Despite this, all I did was purchase 5 boxes of microwave hamburgers and half a bagel (for $7.00, what a good deal).